(231) Padama-nayanaa पद्मनयना - Lotus eyed. ललिता सहस्रनाम स्तोत्र, नाम क्रमांक 247
(232) Vaama-nayanaa वाम नयना -Crooked-eyed. Or giving crooked and misleading proof. ललिता सहस्रनाम स्तोत्र, नाम क्रमांक 332
There is a subtle meaning as well. To those who try to please Her mechanically by worship, Yoga, etc. She gives boons as Varadaa in a straight-forward way. But for them that are Her lovers, She makes an appearance, as if She is angry and so arranges that the world may think that Mother is wrathful to him. In reality, She is loving him the most. She is simply testing him and deluding others about Her love for him. Even in the matter of the earthly love, this is so very common. How crooked than must be the dealings in Divine Love(?) This crookedness is blessings in disguise. It saves the devotee against the envious and wicked souls of the world, and against his own internal enemies, trying to get hold over him. It increases the pangs of love and creates for him a claim, A cause and an occasion for love fight with one's Beloved Mother.
An indescribable joy is experienced by the lover, on being slightly ill-treated by the beloved and by the beloved while slightly ill-treating the lover. That ill-treatment is quite against the heart. The pleasure is experienced in the thought, " The lover loves me not a bit less, although I so ill-treat".
There is the greatest joy in the idea, I am indispensable to my lover. My devotee will die after me ".To test and also to enjoy this pleasure, Mother sometimes seemingly acts most cruelly. When all other worldly thoughts and desires except those that pertain to the loving and being loved disappear, the contest between the lover and the beloved begins. " To love " is higher than "to be loved ", because of the disinterestedness of love and preparedness for any sacrifice by the lover for the beloved. The contest is for being the lover and making a higher sacrifice with great self-surrender.
For the sake of my devotional readers, I do not mind narrating my personal experience. After I began to love Mother turning from Power to love, my house built over with my lifelong savings collapsed in 1927 during Gujerat floods. I did not leave Her. And when I began to love Mother on my conception being raised from Hindu Maataaji to Maai of the whole humanity thinking of Her, day and night in 1931, I had been almost lunatic. Still, I did not leave Her. When I decided to render more useful service in 1937, my wife turned lunatic and had to be in the Yerawada Mental hospital. And yet I am dead certain " I love Mother and Mother loves me, and most passionately".
It should not be misunderstood, that worship and devotion to Mother result in having to be in calamities. Just the reverse. There are two classes of devotees. Mother is Bhukti- Mukti pradaayini; Giver of the highest enjoyment, and highest beatitude and what is described here is applicable to only fewest exceptions. none should have the wrong notion of calamities befalling a worshiper or a devotee. I write this because I have found it necessary from practical facts.
From Bombay (Mumbai) for the same railway fare, you can go to Poona [Pune] (Enjoyment-centre) or Nasik (Renunciation centre). It is for you to demand the ticket for the same fare. But once you are in the Nasik train, you can not have the Bhor Ghat natural scenery on the Poona route, as well. This subtle point has already been previously explained. There is a descending half and descending half, of the whole evolution circle. In reality, both paths lead to happiness. One is the path of securing outer happiness, and the other, of inner happiness. You have to pay the price for both. Inner happiness is extremely dear and price to pay is extremely heavy.
The purchaser of an elephant has to see himself impoverished, to the extent of an amount, which would maintain a family perpetually; but the purchaser's joy on one elephant ride amply counter-balances the price paid. The only thing is that one should not over-estimate one's purchasing power.
In practical life, some worshippers have miraculous agreeability and windfall, whereas other worshippers can barely make the family-living run. The difference lies in the route of the ticket you have purchased. You cannot be, at your fancy, jumping from one train to the other. Of course, when you are a twenty-four hours servant of the Railway Company, you can be on any train, but by that time your natural craving would for Deolali:- The sportive Goddess Mother.
The Railway Station just previous to Nashik (Self-extinction) is Deolali ( Attainment of the Grace of the Sportive Mother).
The enjoyment route leads you to Kirkee and Poona (Pune). " Do it indeed", and "Repeatedly", respectively. There is no end to the cycles of births and deaths, striving and toiling, enjoying and suffering.
There is still a subtler point and I continue the train illustration, to explain Bhukti-Mukti-Pradaayini. There is a uniqueness in the benefit derived from Mother Worship. Under Mother's Refuge, you have the freedom and enjoyment, without fear and with protection, as the baby near the window in a train, that is permitted to enjoy the breeze and sight-seeing, and yet is strongly caught from behind by the Mother, lest the baby may over topple. It has my repeated observation during train travels. The baby with the father has either to forego the breeze and sight-seeing or should take care of itself. If the baby obstinately desires the parental protection as also the enjoyment, it would be soon quietened down with a slap. Father is justice. He would not permit both. Mother is Love and Mercy. Please note that in the case where a father protects and permits, the father is only playing the part of the Mother.
Misleading proofs are:-
Such happenings as above-narrated try to mislead the devotee if he is kachchaa कच्चा (immature). If he is a pukkaa पक्का (mature), others are made to be misled about him. When my wife turned lunatic ( Mother bless her. By Her Grace she has returned home, to save me in the eyes of worldly people, from a certain dishonour.) Kachchaa devotees of Mother left Mother.
There is a very tender emotion and answer whenever devotees fail in tests" I have failed in the test but Thou, Oh Mother. hast failed- in the bounty of Thy Grace, as well. If I had had enough of Grace, I would not have failed in Thy test."
The idea of "misleading-full viewing" is that those who do not secure Her Grace, get deluded with misleading proofs, as a result of wrongly viewing matters, which also proceeded from Her, during a certain stage of evolution, when that is necessary for further experience.
Vaama-Nayanaa also means looking at Her Beloved child through side glances. None should know that, not even the Beloved child. There is a pleasure in the hide and seek, and in the temporary crookedness in Love-Game.
(233) Mrigaakshi मृगाक्षी -Fawn-eyed. ललिता सहस्रनाम स्तोत्र, नाम क्रमांक 561
(234)Mada-ghur-nita-rak-taakshi मदघूर्णितरक्ताक्षी - With reddened eyes rolling with rapture. ललिता सहस्रनाम स्तोत्र, नाम क्रमांक 432
(235) Vishaala-akshi विशालाक्षी - Long eyed. ललिता सहस्रनाम स्तोत्र, नाम क्रमांक 936
Not circular but like the bow, peculiar to Bengali pictures.
(236) Daraan-dolita-dirgha-akshi दरान्दोर्लितदीर्घाक्षी - With slowly moving large eyes. ललिता सहस्रनाम स्तोत्र, नाम क्रमांक 601
Again, Dara डर means fear, and andolita अन्दोलित means driving out. She whose glances dispel the fear of Her devotees.
(237) Lollakshi-kaama-rupini लोलाक्षीकामरूपिणी With oscillating and searching eyes, betraying the intense of finding, seeing and getting one's beloved. ललिता सहस्रनाम स्तोत्र, नाम क्रमांक 454
(238) Taambula-purita-mukhi तांबूलपूरितमुखी -Her mouth is full of betel. ललिता सहस्रनाम स्तोत्र, नाम क्रमांक 559
(239) Mada-paatala-gandabhuh मदपालगंडभूः -With cheeks blushing with rapture. Paatalaa, rose colour. ललिता सहस्रनाम स्तोत्र, नाम क्रमांक 433
Again, Mada means musk beside, pride or joy on success in enjoyment or rut of elephant. Paatalaa is a kind of flower. By musk and the said flower, Her cheeks are painted and perfumed.
(240) Chaampeya-kusuma-priyaa चांपेयकुसुमप्रिया -Fond of the Champaka flower. ललिता सहस्रनाम स्तोत्र, नाम क्रमांक 435
(241) Mrinaala-mridu-dorlataa मृणालमृदुदोर्लता - Her creeper-like arms soft as the lotus stem.ललिता सहस्रनाम स्तोत्र, नाम क्रमांक 579
(242) Shaatodari शातोदरी- Having a slender belly. ललिता सहस्रनाम स्तोत्र, नाम क्रमांक 130
Udar means 'belly' and this name reminds one of the popular expression"Mother swallows the faults, and hides the crimes and sins of children in Her belly", Shaatodari also means having hundreds of caves, i.e., the softest corners to shelter and give a safe refuge to the devotees.
(243)Tanu-madhyaa तनुमध्या -Slender waisted. ललिता सहस्रनाम स्तोत्र, नाम क्रमांक 360
(244) Ratna-kinkini-mekhalaa रणत्किंकिणीमेखला- Having a girdle of tinkling bells. ललिता सहस्रनाम स्तोत्र, नाम क्रमांक 312
Tinkling is infatuating.
When that is heard, ordinary mortals fall in a swoon with unbearable and overpowering joy, whereas greatest Yogis like Shiva wonder, on finding that their state of full bliss is broken, being surprised with the experience, that a still higher joy does exist. These then run maddened with the desire of hearing that tinkling again and again.
(245) Paadaambujaa -Lotus -Feeted .(Extra).
I could not complete this list without the meditation of Her Lotus Feet and I could not find a name. I have therefore coined in and incorporated this new name.
(246) Hamsini हंसिनी -Swan. ललिता सहस्रनाम स्तोत्र, नाम क्रमांक 456
Hamsa(the swan) is traditionally gifted with the art of separating milk from water and sipping it away. Mother also considers what is best in Her devotees and takes no notice of their weakness, fault, crime or sin.
(247) Vilaasini विलासिनी -Playful. ललिता सहस्रनाम स्तोत्र, नाम क्रमांक 340
Playing with Her powers of concealing the truth, and showing untruth as truth and truth as untruth. Vilaasa primarily means extension. Vilaasa, therefore, means such acts, gestures, projection and development by speeches and tricks, as intensify Love.
(248) Taruni तरूणी Ever young. ललिता सहस्रनाम स्तोत्र, नाम क्रमांक 358
None will be tired of Her, and She is not tired of so much worry of the devotees, and the work of conducting the universe. Her play with devotees is above the influence of Time, insipidity, fatigue, tiresomeness or monotony.
(249) Nitya-yau-vanaa नित्ययौवना -With renewing youthfulness. ललिता सहस्रनाम स्तोत्र, नाम क्रमांक 430
(250) Mada-shaalini मदशालिनी - Shining with rapture.
Mada means a kind of bliss.ललिता सहस्रनाम स्तोत्र, नाम क्रमांक 431